Pink clouds

So I have reached the halfway point, and to celebrate, JVI flew our community and the Pohnpeian community to join the JVI community on Majuro in the Marshall Islands where we had our ReOrientation(for the 1st years)/DisOrientation (for the 2nd years). Most people erroneously assume that one island out here is just like the next, however upon leaving the state of Chuuk after a year of limited mobility I was able to appreciate the subtle similarities born of vast differences. Majuro is a 33 mile long strip that bends in the shape of a horseshoe – and by strip I mean the width of the island is such that you could stand in the ocean on one side, and with a modicum of effort throw a rock into the ocean on the other side. I thought I would have suffered from a serious bout of claustrophobia, but having miles of endless straight-aways and new territory to run up and down made the island seem much larger than it actually was. We were wisked away to the luxurious Ajeltake retreat house on the more rural side of the island where the 14 of us (5 Chuukese, 2 Pohnpeian, 5 Marshallese and 2 JVI Program directors) spent 5 days in fruitful reflection, discussion and silence. Being physically removed from life here at Xavier, or Pohnpei Catholic School or Assumption allowed us all the opportunity to gain the perspective we needed on our purpose, our mission here and our JVI experience.
First it was so wonderful to get to meet/see again our fellow JV’s and hear about there lives in their respective countries. Questions were flying back and forth, catching up, comparing, contrasting our lives since we’ve left, and discussing where our lives are headed. It was also amazing to see how my community when transplanted among all of these other people transformed. I think often times we get so caught up in the everyday that we forget how much beauty pervades the people we are surrounded by. We harp on their flaws, become easily frustrated by their imperfections and dwell on their inability to meet our expectations. There were so many times when I could sit back and marvel at the presence of God so alive in the room, and appreciate the way the dynamic of communities change when fresh faces are thrown into the mix!
As peaceful as it was to sit by the ocean side, caressed by the island breeze and awed by the exhibition of nature’s artistic prowess everyday at dusk, the retreat aroused feelings of frustration, doubt and discomfort. A careful review of the year shed incriminating light on those areas where I have failed to meet even the minimal standards set for myself. Particularly the day of silence stirred within me a sense of annoyance with myself for all of the times that I settled. Given the nature of Xavier, it is often times so much easier to settle into what is comfortable – to watch a movie with the American gang rather than diversifying the crowd, or to retreat to solitude instead of having a stilted conversation, or staying on the hill during weekends instead of venturing off to my sponsor’s home, or to get lost in lesson planning instead of studying the language (which I still am awful at!). Furthermore, even at those moments when I did realize my tendency to remain in the comfortable, I did nothing, nor did I call out and challenge anyone else who fell into similar patterns. I think it is one think to live in another country, but it is a completely different thing to LIVE in another culture and live with a mindset of immersion and an attitude of sensitivity so as to soak up as much as is humanly possible rather than just skirting by with a superficial understanding. And so I return to Xavier with a renewed sense of determination to learn the language and to shed the American safety net that has sheltered me for the past year so that I do not return to ReO/DisO with this same feeling of discontent.
I think that being committed to the relationships formed here as opposed to any attachment to the place itself also minimally helps to justify my actual purpose here. We read a fantastic article by Ivan Illyich http://www.altruists.org/f451 that flew in the face of all of my reasoning for joining JVI in the first place. Our culture looks at generosity as an admirable quality in people – their ability to give – a virtue that I truly wanted to cultivate….all the while failing to realize that I have the opportunity to cultivate that quality because I am in a position to. I have the resources and the means to do so, and the very act of me offering to help, as altruistic as it may seem, in a way automatically assumes a sense of condescension in that I am presuming others need my help. That they are in a position that necessitates someone to come in and make things better. I was forced to question – am I making things better, or is my being here more of a detriment than a benefit to the Chuukese, or my students? In other words, I come to Micronesia thinking that these kids need a better education, one that meets the U.S. standards – obviously making the arrogant assumption that U.S. standards of education are superior – and I stroll into the classroom subconsciously bringing with me my American ways of teaching that reward the individual, and push for perfection because whether I realize it or not – it’s the only way I’ve ever known. Is that truly what is best – to instinctually force this rugged individualism on a culture that values a communal way of life? For example, we hold an awards ceremony at the end of the year to honor those students who have achieved academic success. First, it typically tends to embarrass a lot of students who would prefer to work hard and go unnoticed and blend in with their classmates rather than stand up in front of the school as a model of success. Second – what is success? For most of these students, success is “trying your best” and so we are sending this message that because they didn’t receive an award for trying their best – they are failures? Who are we to determine this standard? Am I socializing these kids to become students fit to graduate and enroll in mainland institutions or to value the culture in which they have been raised and to perpetuate their family name and way of life – AND which one is more correct? For most of us, we equate more western with better. We think “Well, democracy works for us here in America and look at us – we’re the most affluent countries in the world.” And so we, with all good intentions, through compacts and exorbitant amounts of fiscal support try and introduce this democratic, capitalistic structure of government into other countries thinking that we are helping them adopt a similar infrastructure to “get back on their feet.” The fact of the matter is, you cannot transplant this western ideal into a heritage of familial ties and hierarchies without consequences. Now Chuuk is left with a government who cannot manage finances well enough to pave roads, or maintain continuous electricity for 24 hour intervals because governing officials are elected based on who has the larger family instead of sheer competence and the power company typically doles out electricity to family members at minimal costs and thus does not have enough income to operate consistently.
I apologize if I have only further confused you, but perhaps Illych’s link will help contextualize the preceding ramblings.

Though I did spend much time in internal discussion and turmoil, one seemingly unrelated, resolution I was able to make in my serene observation of a typical Monday sunset was that most clouds are really pink. God really does make pink clouds.

Cultural Day 2006

I’m not really sure that pictures can capture it, but you can try if you want….(AJ uploaded several on his blog site if you want to check them out – go to the top of the page and click on his link) Words still fall short of capturing it and thus I apologize that the following is nothing more than a string of incoherent thoughts……Micronesian culture at its finest. Micronesian National Anthem…. “Across all Micronesia join hands on every side..” Dances that transform a student who has yet to utter a complete sentence in my class into a belligerent war general. Bare asses minimally covered by a radiant red thuu with two sinewy legs poking out from either side of the loin cloth – whose horsepower is not to be underestimated when shaking the concrete walls of Calligan Hall. Poorly tied thuus. Barefeet. The glow of coconut oil on glistening bodies artificially tinted yellow. 19 diverse faculty members ungracefully, yet proudly pay tribute to the Chuukese culture. Authentic foods. Authentic handicrafts that make the average person marvel at the infinite number of uses for a single coconut leaf. Pride. Native tongue. Unity. Inclusion. War paint. Headdress. Coconut bras. Status. History. Long hair. Flowers. Kimonos. Fertility dances. Mosquito dances. Banging. Shouting. Chanting. Singing. Slapping. Whistling. Thrusting. Stomping. Drumming. Wooden trashcans. Sticks. Ceremony. Family. Sakau pounding. Breadfruit pounding. Leadership. Absorbing. Appreciating. Showing off. Flags. Deference. Submission. Aggression. Passion. Thunderous applause.

Sensé

468 exam essays graded. 180 days (questionable) completed successfully (questionable). 148 students. 35 seniors walking. 4 days till graduation…and counting.

School is nearly out for the summer and even though Chuukese time would suggest life things becoming even more relaxed than they already are, Xavier has become even more chaotic in the past few days. To occupy the idle time no longer spent in classes, Fr. Arthur has contracted the students to decorate, clean, move chairs, construct the stage, and make final preparation for the upcoming events. Parents have slowly been arriving on island just in time for the cultural day celebrations which begin tomorrow. Grass skirts, coconut bras, thus (loin cloths) and local handicrafts are arriving in boxfuls. Even as I write this, three ladies sit next to me creating flyers essentially inviting the entire island of Weno to join in the festivities tomorrow! While I could sit for hours and write about my expectations for the splendor of what is to come……..I think I must save that for an entry all of its own…

Aside from all of commotion up here at Xavier, I’ve been privileged with the opportunity to assistant coach the Chuuk State Track and Field team slated to make their appearance at the Micro Games in Saipan in late June!!!! Of course the job presents its challenges as most of the athletes do not speak English, but sweating together, busting ass, running – all transcend the language barrier. Even so, it’s still frustrating at times wanting to say SOO much – to coach, to teach, to learn – to ask how much it hurts when running 7 miles on gravel and coral – barefoot, to challenge them when they slack off, to listen when they complain of standard aches – all of which culminates in “Fokkun och” (very good).

But every day, even if only a little at a time, I get to vicariously live out a little bit of my passion though them - especially in those focused moments, running side by side with a tiny 26 year old Micronesian named Puna. A car pulls up beside us and in Chuukese, from what I understand, asks “Who is that freakshow (ad-libbed) running with you!?” And slightly fatigued he responds with a simple “sensé.”

Unfortunately, as hard as the athletes are working, we are still uncertain as to whether they will be allowed to participate. It seems as though the Chuuk recreation Office, who originally guaranteed assistance in sending athletes to Saipan, cannot make good on their promise and the team needs to seek alternative means of getting to Saipan. The athletes, as of right now, show up everyday and work their faces off unaware of the possibility that they may never get to exhibition their hard work. Hopefully in the next few days we should find out whether or not the trip will be a go!!!

If you might be interested in helping financially, if you have any fundraising ideas, if you have any suggestions, if you have any connections that might help us get these athletes to Saipan, PLEASE PLEASE contact me. Your support and your creativity is GREATLY appreciated.

My Contact Info:

xhs-jvi@mail.fm
just put jtrunce(or any variation) in the subject line!!

Or if you write within the next two few weeks -hit me up at jtruncellito1@loyola.edu because we are headed to Majuro in just a few hours!!!!!

Thank you for your continued love and encouragement. If you are graduating, transitioning or maintaining your daily routine in the upcoming weeks I pray that the Lord is with you through every moment of it.